I keep sitting on our stairs. Halfway up, halfway down. Just unable to find a familiar footing, feeling a little lost.
I’m in an in-between. It’s for the best of reasons. Our son has been given the amazing opportunity to live on a college campus, to pursue his education and goals, to become who he is meant to be. I don’t discount the gift of all that.
But this is new territory for me. It’s parenting in a different way. It’s letting go of control in so many ways. It’s learning to trust God on a different level for him.
We are figuring out new family rhythms, trying to find new routines and new ways to make sure we are staying connected to him when he isn’t here. It’s different and weird and… well, I just miss my kid.
So I’m caught in transition, not really ready or sure how to take these next steps into our new stage and unable to go back into what used to be.
********
Maybe (especially with the year we’ve all had) you have your own place on the stairs?
If you’re in an in-between, too, just know I’m here with you and that this feeling won’t last forever.
What I know for sure is that we are still held, securely, in our uncertainty. God stays with us, whether we are heading into tomorrow without hesitation or crying on the stairs. He doesn’t turn away from our hearts when we’re hurting. He actually comes even closer.
So from my stairs to yours… my prayer is for peace, for the assurance of a God who is never unsure, for the confidence in knowing He will hold us steady as we take one more step and one more after that, until we find ourselves standing exactly where we are meant to be.
Hebrews 13:5 / Romans 8:26-39 / Isaiah 42:3