Submission is Not a Foul Word

Many of us will remember Candace Cameron Bure from ABC’s Full House, where we affectionately knew her as “DJ Tanner.” Today Candace is a role model to young women everywhere, with a testimony of growing up in Hollywood, while growing in faith with God.

This month, Candace gets candid on the topic of submission when a reader asks, “I was wondering if you could give me some tips on how to be a godly wife?” 

I have noticed that a subject you speak on most often is that of being a godly wife.  I would love to see you in person, but until you come to Kalamazoo, MI I was wondering if you could give me some tips on how to be a godly wife?  I was SO encouraged to hear that your husband was not saved when you were first married. My husband is saved, but his relationship with Christ has weakened recently. His father (who was his best friend) recently passed away and he has been growing distant from me, but especially from God. 

I believe this is the time he needs to rely on God most and am hoping you could give me some ideas/tips for how I can encourage him to reconnect with our Heavenly Father.

Thank you for your message and any help you can give!


The understanding that marriage is an equal partnership where husband and wife are equally important, but aren’t designed to share the same role, is  the foundation to being a godly wife, and encouraging our husbands in faith.

The Bible says, “For the man is not of the woman: but the woman of the man. Neither was the man created for the woman: but the woman for the man” (1Corinthians 11:8-9).

Today’s society would have us believe there should be no differences between a man and a woman. Society has it wrong.   We were created equally, but very differently, and so we have differing responsibilities in our marriage—ours being a HELPMEET. God created Adam, saying, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him”. (Gen. 2:18)

By respecting my husband, and submitting to him as the authority figure in our family–as he should be–my actions have helped to win him over without a word. First Peter 3:1 says, “In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives.”

As I’ve mentioned in previous articles, submission is not a foul word. I don’t become a slave to my husband’s every demand—instead I take joy in serving him, and ultimately pleasing God. Val doesn’t take advantage of me, but rather gains respect for me, and chooses to love and honor me as I do him. This chain of command not only nurtures respect one to another, it also pleases the Lord, to whom we are ultimately accountable.

I encourage you to read Titus chapter 2, which teaches us a reverent way of life, and to also pick up a copy of Created to Be His Helpmeet by Debbie Pearl. You can purchase it on their website at or check your local Christian bookstore. This book is THE BEST in becoming a godly wife!  You may hate it, but you’ll thank me for recommending it. 🙂 

Being there for your husband (once you’ve read and applied the book) will be the best thing you can do for him to reconnect with God.

Read more articles like this in Candace’s monthly column: 
“Candid Candace – The Qs & As on Growing with God”


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