A Carol for Christmas
By Robin Lee Hatcher
(Zondervan 2006)

It’s time to curl up by the fire with a cup of cocoa and enjoy some heart-warming romance. You’ll love A Carol for Christmas, written by best-selling author Robin Lee Hatcher (her 50th book!). This beautiful novella can be read in one quiet evening, taking you to Boise, Idaho, set in the late 60s. Hatcher says she got the idea for the story based on her own difficulties in early marriage as a teenage bride.

Going against their parents’ wishes, Carol and Jonathan are newlyweds, struggling with too many bills to pay and not enough time to be together. Both have dreams: Carol is an accomplished singer and longs to make a debut in Nashville, and Jonathan is a rising manager in his family’s retail business. Will their love withstand all the obstacles that threaten to tear them apart? Unlike our modern culture which encourages people to live together before marriage, you’ll find A Carol for Christmas a refreshing and powerful love story. (And you can chat about it with the author via her blog!)

Praying for My Life,
by Marion Bond West
(Guideposts Books 2006)

Do you feel like you’re on the verge of losing hope? Marion Bond West has been there, and in her new spiritual memoir, she’ll show you how she survived with a little known prayer in the book of Habakkuk. Now a grandmother and contributing editor for Guideposts magazine, Bond West has had to overcome early widowhood, raising four children as a single mom, and dealing with rebellion, substance abuse, and bipolar disorder in her adult sons. Marion’s honest, transparent writing will restore your hope.

“Behold, I am the LORD, the God of all flesh.
Is there anything too hard for Me?”
- Jeremiah 32:27

One Easter weekend when I was a teen, someone slipped into our backyard while my family was sleeping. They didn’t count on meeting up with Gretchen, our friendly Keeshond, who probably grabbed the nearest squeaky toy and begged the intruder for a little midnight play. Keeshonds aren’t normally an aggressive breed, and Gretchen’s wide-eyed doggy charm could melt the most hard-shelled dog hater around. Underneath layers of fur beat a heart that would follow you anywhere. And that’s exactly what she must have done.

The next morning, we discovered the gate wide open. The latch was intentionally tricky, and it had taken a long arm, some fancy finger work, and patience to open it in the dark. We searched for over an hour, thinking that Gretchen might have slipped out after the intruder left, to explore our neighborhood. She rarely left the spacious yard. We checked the edges of a nearby highway, in case she’d been hit by a car, but didn’t find her. I imagined her romping from gate to gate, greeting other dogs and having herself a ball.

“There’s a chance she may have been stolen,” my dad decided. “We’ll just keep our eyes out for her and hope she comes home soon.”

My thoughts turned to the day my mom had sneaked that furry pup home from a pet store to surprise my dad. He’d rolled his eyes, pretended to be upset, and asked if she’d lost her mind. We already had a cat, and what-in-the-world-was-she-thinking? But she handed the pup to him for closer inspection, knowing he’d fall instantly in love with her the minute she nuzzled his neck. He did, and she spoiled the whole family as the years went by. I already missed her sweet personality, perky expression, and backward-curling tail that reminded me of a tightly coiled spring. How would I stand never knowing what had happened to her?

After our Easter church service, we headed out to look for Gretchen again, calling her name every few steps. I half expected to find her waiting by her food dish out back. My dad jammed his hands in his pockets and rattled his change-something he did unconsciously when he was deep in thought. “Dogs have good radar. Maybe she’ll find her way home,” he tried to assure me.

Silently I asked God to direct her steps toward home. I didn’t promise to become a missionary in a snake-infested jungle or give up M&Ms for a year. I simply asked the God of the universe to undo what had been done. He’d hung the moon and was an expert at rotating seasons and providing our planet with light and heat; surely He could turn her four paws in the right direction. She’d find her way back-if she wasn’t chained or confined indoors.

A week passed. Two. Three. In my frustration, I eventually stopped praying, and decided that it wasn’t meant to be. I hoped Gretchen was with people who were treating her well, and if they weren’t, I secretly hoped that she’d rebel and bite them so they’d turn her loose.

On a hot July afternoon, my dad and I were talking in the front yard. I started across the street to check our mailbox, when I heard a familiar bark. The bark turned to a high-pitched yap-yap-yap, and I turned to see Gretchen, racing up the middle of the street, her tail curled high over her back. A short length of frayed rope hung from her collar and her once-beautiful gray coat was now tangled around hundreds of cockleburs.

She leapt and danced around me like a prodigal dog, then raced for the backyard gate as if she’d been gone for just an hour instead of months. We filled her dish to the brim with food and water, and hardly took our eyes off her for the rest of the day.

Her footpads were cracked and bloody, her body worn out. She’d lost weight, but hadn’t lost her playfulness. Dad shook his head in amazement. “She’s come a long way. I wish she could tell us what she’s been through.”

Decades later, I’m still floored by the memory of Gretchen’s journey home. With the passing of time, it has become a picture of God’s faithfulness at work. Long after I’d given up searching for our dog, He honored my plea for help. Long after the shock of her disappearance faded from my mind, He was busy working out the details, planning to point her toward home. Through the experience, I came to believe that God takes pure delight in the details of ordinary, everyday life.

I also learned that there’s a priceless beauty in the act of relinquishing my own timeline when I pray–to trust the Lord to work at his own pace, in his own way, for a bigger picture and a higher purpose. That lesson didn’t come naturally; it took an intruder and a dog to drive the message home.

©2008, Bonnie Bruno

For more slice-of-life stories, visit Bonnie’s Macromoments blog: http://macromoments.blogspot.com

Life is beautiful… Stop and smell the roses… Life is a bowl of cherries… Those are easy things to say when life is going your way. But what about when you are feeling the pressures or dark days of life? I’ve spoken to a few people recently that were going through really difficult times. Illnesses, relational strains, financial struggles, sorrows and other situations were weighing them down. Uncertainty and disappointments were taking the place of joy and creativity. Life in times of pain doesn’t look so beautiful. When the clouds are looming and the pressures are mounting, the happy days you dream about and the reality of life seem worlds apart. It can seem futile to try to find beauty in the rubble of life’s hurt. We often can be tempted to drown our sorrows in denial, destructive habits and negative thinking. It can seem like God has forsaken us.

One of the tender things God has done for us is to give us beauty amidst the storms of life. Recognizing beauty in our surroundings can work like a balm to soothe the pain of life and keep our focus on God’s love and care for us. I think of the rainbow, colors streaming through the dark sky as a glorious reminder of the promises of God. It is a beautiful symbol that can help us visualize God’s presence and grace in times of darkness and difficulty. If we accept beauty as a gift from God, we can take part in the mysterious connection between seeing beauty and sensing God’s love for us.

Here is a wonderful quote:

“In all ranks of life the human heart yearns
for the beautiful;
and the beautiful things
that God makes are His gift to all alike.”
—Harriet Beecher Stowe

When I was going through a dark period in my own life, I felt that small inner yearning for beauty. Yet, beauty felt distant. All around me I felt darkness, sadness and disappointment. But instead of running to numb my wounds in a destructive way, I grabbed a hold of that small yearning as something God placed in me for a reason. I took a step of faith toward connecting to God through the beauty in life. I headed out to the garden center and bought spring flowers to brighten my dark and dreary front walkway. I felt such spiritual symbolism in taking that step towards something beautiful. I was reaching out to God and He met me right there amidst the petunias! Those flowers were His gift to me. Beauty was reassurance in visual form that He was in control and would carry me right through the darkest hours.

It was a small step, planting those spring flowers, but an important one. With a beautiful front walkway, my focus started to change. I swept the front porch and stepped back to take a look. God was right there saying, “See? I made these flowers for your enjoyment! Don’t you see that I am caring for you even in the small details of life?” With the outside of my home more colorful and cheery, my world felt a little brighter. I knew God was with me, encouraging me to trust Him in spite of how bleak things had looked the day before.

After admiring the work that God and I had accomplished in the yard, I walked in the house. I turned back to look at the view from my window. The beauty was still there. Finding beauty that day didn’t change my outward circumstances, but it changed my inner world and perspective. That small dose of beauty, God’s gift to me, reminded me that God was bigger than my circumstances. He knew exactly what I needed and made me flowers to soothe my heartache. I just had to reach out and take them and see them as God’s gift.

With the bouquet of beauty from God I took a deep breath and started to put my world back in order. The connection between finding beauty in the outer world and the connection to God in my inner world was profound. Suddenly I realized I could choose to have a life marked by order and beauty rather than chaos and hurt. Still unable to change the original circumstances, I felt empowered to look at my world through God’s eyes. God wanted me to see beauty in the process of refining my life. I disciplined myself to trust in God’s plan by surrounding myself with daily reminders of the God I wanted to serve—the God who created the Heavens and the Earth in perfect order, the God who made colors and scents and textures for our enjoyment, who made birds to sing and a brilliant sun to shine through the clouds and rain, and the God who made a bouquet of flowers just for me.

James 1:17
“Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father…”

©2008, Melissa Michaels
Garden Photos, Melissa Michaels
Daisies, istock.com

Socks hurl across the kitchen, a hail of chaos splintering morning routine and order. Thunked in the back of head, I spin from sink and into the face of a grinning twelve-year-old. I am set to return with volley of words about maturity and setting an example and simply folding laundry instead of rocking the boat. His younger brothers are already whipping back knitted wools with mismatched sweatsocks. And then one of the statutes of the Geneva Convention of Motherhood flashes across my interior screen: Ignore negative attention-seeking behavior so as not affirm it. I can still remember the assured voice of the retired schoolteacher who insisted that was the only way to raise children. Eyes on stacked plates, I quietly direct younger boys to return to the organizing of the cutlery drawer, gently ask older boy to finish folding towels. The commotion slowly calms and I am left to wondering.

Is it true? Ignore attention-seekers? Don’t give them what they seek: attention. I shine the kitchen sink, mulling. Attention-seekers are hungry. They are empty, needy. They seek that which they need: attention. We feed hungry children. We clothe cold children. Do we not give attention to attention-seeking children? True, no negative, lecturing attention. But, surely, more good, loving, affirming attention. I mentally revise that mothering statute: Attention-getting antics are red flags to do just that: give more attention. That the relationship needs more attention, more time, more intimacy, more affirmation.

I carry in another load of wet laundry and call for that boy-man. A laundry rack needs assembling. I carefully read instructions, noting parts and pieces; he dives into connecting, screwing, aligning. I applaud. He screws on a wheel, never looking up, but a smile leaks.  I hand him a section, ask what he needs next. We laugh when we get one rack backwards. The roots of relationship grow deeper.  And I think: are behavioral problems symptoms of relationship problems? If behavior breaks out in an attention-grabbing rash, doesn’t the relationship require immediate heart attention?

Not ignoring. Not time-outs. Not banishment. How does Father God parent?  He whispers, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.”  Though I was “a brute beast before [Him]…[He] hold[s] me by my right hand” (Ps. 73:22-23). He meets my raging antics with what I need: more of Himself. Relationship. When we have behavioral problems, it is indeed a relationship problem: we don’t have one with Him.

“Parenting is not a skill to perform. But a relationship to cultivate,” writes Dr. Gordon Neufeld, author of Hold On To Your Kids. Mirroring our spiritual development, parenting growth results not from techniques or procedures, but from rich and real relationship.

A close friend writes me of recent day of mothering. “Katharina, when tired, quickly becomes sour and sullen… which moves quickly to nasty. I rebuked her and gave the space and option to change her attitude. In her “space” she decided to lay it on more. I gave her some warm, unrelated attention and let her lie on the couch under a blanket with a book, but the snuggle on the couch didn’t change her heart at all. She just kept working her way in deeper.

“I called her to me, (and of course, she refused at first… and then came, all the while telling me how I was wrecking her day.)  She wouldn’t let me touch her nor look me in the eye. I pulled her stiff body towards me. And then I said just what you said to your child the other day. She didn’t budge. At first. I said it again… She almost immediately crawled into my lap, melted into me, and stayed there several minutes. Before she left, she gave me several kisses and for the rest of the day… the whole rest of the day… hardly left my side.”

What had I said that day to my child, the words my friend spoke too? Words that didn’t originate with me. I only repeated the words God Himself spoke first. To this nasty, impenetrable, attention-seeking heart.

I had been putting away the last of the laundry. Cookies cooled on the countertop rack, the wafting sweet luring boy-man to hunt down the source. Walking through with a stack of towels in arm, I shook a no towards prowling boy-man. “Cookies are for bedtime reading. Please don’t touch yet.”  Moments later, out of the corner of my eye,  a glimpse of the swipe, the dashing away. I call boy-man’s name. His face says it all: guilty, red, ashamed. A rebuke surges, punishment riding its crest. But the Spirit comes quickly.

And brings words of relationship, relationship that I only know because He first loved me. My lips move, but the words are His: “Child, I love you unconditionally and nothing you do will change that. Always, no matter what, I love you deeply. I am very sorry for what you did here.” I inhale, exhale. “But  I love you all the same.” I pause and take a deep breath. His eyes are watery blue. “May I grant you mercy, just as Jesus grants me mercy?” His eyes drift away. And I slip to the mudroom, seeking quiet dark to lick these mothering wounds and all the disappointment.

But he comes too. With words of his own, words I don’t expect. “Mom? I am sorry I hurt you. I did the wrong thing. I shouldn’t have done that…. Is there anything I can do to make that right? Can I help you with something?”

Mercy did that, performed a heart change that punishment is impotent to accomplish. It did it to my own heart: transformed relationship. I wanted attention. I wanted self-gratification. I sinned. God gave me not penalty, but Himself. He bathed in me mercy, healing deep wounds. He wrapped me up in relationship. “Mercy triumphs over judgment” (James 2:12). Love does what law cannot.

And yet He knows there is no formula, or pat, easy answers. We reject Him, sin against Him, betray Him. But He, Love, pursues relentlessly. In the face of heartache. Our behavior drives Him deeper into relationship. He knows full well that the relationship problem is not a result of His failure to love, but the stoniness of His children’s hearts. It is not an issue of how much Father loves His children, but how much, if at all, His children love their Father. Undaunted, He gives His immediate love attention to the rash of our sin. In hopes that His love will stir our hearts.

I look into the face of boy-man. “Yes, son, there is something you can do.” He waits and I wade into those eyes. It feels rich and right. “Tomorrow, could we match the socks together, you and I?”

©2008, Ann Voskamp

Related Resources:
Hold on to Your Kids, Gordon Neufeld

This month Jill talks with award-winning singer/songwriter Bree Noble. Bree’s powerful vocals and commanding stage presence have won over audiences at large venues such as Saddleback Church and Dodger Stadium and intimate venues like small town churches and coffeehouses.

Although her vocals are always compelling, her greatest asset is her songwriting. Bree is a songwriter who doesn’t sugar-coat the Christian life or water down the issues Christians face. With influences like Nichole Nordeman, Sara Grvoes and Ginny Owens, her musical style is both mainstream and eclectic. Her lyrics are bold in their revelation of her own faults and struggles and how she has faced them with God’s guidance. Bree has a different perspective to convey–one of not just a woman of faith, but of an individual who has learned to overcome great adversity; she has glaucoma and has been legally blind since birth.

I was pleased to hear that you are coming to speak in my area. I know that I’ll be there and I’d like to also bring my daughter, however I am not sure as to the content of your testimony.

She is 8-years-old, and has been relatively sheltered. She understands many of the worldly temptations since we discuss them openly, but the points in between making the bad decision and the bottom of the pit have not been spelled out to her in detail.

Would it be appropriate to bring her? If not, what age would be? I have a number of friends with the same question.

I am looking forward to meeting you. Thanks for taking the time to answer my question.

_________________________

Thank you so much for your question. I actually wish people asked me this more often! It’s important to know what we are allowing our children to listen to even if it’s a Christian testimony and someone you grew up watching.

I do believe my testimony is appropriate for any age although it’s most relatable to teens and adults. I don’t talk about sex in length although I mention it once by using the word “intimate.” I briefly mention being a “drug addict or alcoholic” in talking about those things I wasn’t.

The strongest topic is about Heaven and Hell. I openly talk about Hell–not describing the pit, but sharing how we are all bound for it, if not for the grace of Jesus Christ. I have a 9, an 8 and a 6-year-old child. The two older ones have heard my talk (my six-year-old just isn’t interested.) We talk about heaven and hell openly at home. Without the talk of Hell, Heaven would not make sense, or would lessen its indescribable awesomeness. Some parents feel that only God’s love should be talked about with a child, but I beg to differ. I believe that by sharing the WHOLE gospel–which includes sin and Hell–they’ll experience a stronger walk into adulthood.

I hope this helps you. In case you’re still in doubt, you can also listen to my testimony on my website. I keep pretty close to what you’ll hear on the site, although I’ll often share other stories as the spirit leads me as well.

Thank you again for such an important question and I hope to see you, with our without your daughter as the Lord leads you!

As we approach the Passover and Easter season, my thoughts as a mother turn toward another mother from two thousand years ago. A lady who lived in Nazareth, whose name was Mary. This mother stood at the foot of the cross watching her first born son, Jesus Christ, take on the sin of all mankind and take his final breath. Oh how her heart must have broken.

I have often wondered at what moment had she totally yielded her will as a mom over to God? Was it when Jesus was learning to walk and fell, or when he sat in the temple with the scholars, or when he fed five thousand from a few fish and loaves of bread? How she must have wanted to reach him as the crowds spat on him, the guards beat him and then hung him on a cross.

Through the years as she watched Jesus grow up and become independent from her care, did she have to continually remind herself that God is in control and that it’s only when she let go and let God handle things that true healing and hope can come from the ashes of despair?

The mistake many of us make in hanging on tightly to the reins of our lives – or the lives of others. True growth requires letting go.

True healing begins when we make the head-heart connection that we must “let go and let God” concerning all things, not just painful situations concerning our adult children. This kind of surrender doesn’t mean we are giving up, that we no longer care what happens to our adult children. On the contrary, it means we relinquish their care to a far greater and infinitely more powerful Caregiver. It means at last that we have come to the end of our own selfishness and can now see the possibilities available when we step out of the way of spiritual progress.

When the “letting go” part has been accomplished in our hearts and the “letting God” part becomes the focus of our lives, something amazing begins to happen: we feel free. We may not even realize how binding a prison our fears concerning our adult children had become until those fears are gone.

Yielding everything to God, total surrender, is something we must do daily. We open our hands and release those we love to Him.

Yielding to God may be something you do well – time and time again – and then if you are like most of us, you just as quickly “unyield” without even realizing.

Mary could have protected Jesus. She could have forbid him to go to the garden of Gethsemane… but she knew he had to fulfill his own destiny. We have to let our children experience pain and suffering to let them become the people God wants them to be – sometimes we have to let them choose their own course.

©2008, Allison Bottke

Available now from Harvest House Publishers:
“Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children -
Six Steps to Hope and Healing for Struggling Parents”
by Allison Bottke.

For more information visit: www.SanitySupport.com

Want to win a copy? We’re giving one away this month!
Visit our Book Draw to enter

“He has risen, just as He said.”
~ Matthew 28:26 ~

Have you given much thought to yeast? Just a little bit of yeast can have a great impact on a large batch when making breads. A little leaven leavens the whole lump. (2 Corinthians 5:6)  Scripture often refers to yeast as sin.  Yeast is actually a fungi. Fungi will draw its nutrition from many things including decaying organic matter.

When we think of the last supper we remember Jesus breaking unleavened bread with the disciples. Bread that hadn’t risen. Bread without yeast. This Passover meal was a reminder of when Moses freed the Jews from slavery in Egypt. They escaped so quickly they didn’t have time to let their bread rise, and therefore ate unleavened bread.  This celebration foreshadowed what was to come.

We are encouraged to eat the unleavened bread and drink the wine as a remembrance of Christ’s suffering on the cross.  Scriptures remind us to partake in the “Last Supper” as we do show the Lord’s death until He comes (1 Corinthians 11:23). Partaking of the unleavened bread and wine is traditional for most Good Friday services.

But it doesn’t end there…
We serve a RISEN Savior!

Three days later Christ rose from the dead! Sin no longer had a death grip on mankind. Through the sacrifice of the perfect Lamb of God, all can partake in His eternal glory.

While unleavened bread reminds us of His suffering and death, it does not signify a Risen Savior! A Savior that overcame sin and death!

When I bake with yeast, I find a unique transformation occurs in my mixture.  I start with a bowl ¼ full of ingredients then I add the yeast. While the yeast appears to be the smallest and least significant part of my mixture it starts to have the greatest impact.  After I add yeast, things start to transform. As I wait, the dough starts to rise.  I can punch down the dough, but the dough will continue to rise. Soon what started out as a ¼ of a bowl of ingredients, rises to a full bowl of dough.

When I make dough it reminds me of my Risen Savior–the Savior who overcame sin through death on the cross. The people thought they had ridden themselves of Jesus by burying Him in the ground. They rolled the stone in front of the tomb to seal away this man who preached a gospel they did not want to hear.

Little did they know that God’s perfect plan was only beginning to unfold! Little did they know that His death was just what was required! Little did they know that three days later He would rise from the dead!

The risen Christ has spread His gospel so much further than the living Jesus did. The gospel of the Risen Christ has spanned the entire world–generation after generation.

It is very important to partake in the memory of the last supper–the feast of the unleavened bread. The memory of God’s own sinless son, beaten, bruised and crucified for our sins. Christ orders us to do this in remembrance of Him.

But each time you use yeast, take time to remember the Risen Savior! The Savior who overcame sin! The Savior who hid in the earth for just a little while – THEN ROSE – changing your life and mine for eternity!

Bonnie’s Easy Easter Cinna-Bons
Bake 350 F 20 – 25 min.

Buns
2 packs of Instant Quick Rise Yeast
½ cup warm water
6 eggs
1 ½ cups sugar
2 c milk
1 tsp salt
1 cup butter
Flour (approx 8 cups)

Topping
1/3 cup butter
½ cup sugar (white or brown)
2 T cinnamon

Scald milk and set aside to cool.  Melt butter.  In a large bowl, add melted butter, sugar, salt and beaten eggs.  Stir scalded milk, water and yeast into egg mixture.  Gradually add flour and stir until kneaded into a soft ball that no longer sticks to the sides of the bowl.  Place clean tea town over bowl and let rise in a warm humid place until it doubles in size (approx. ¾ hour).  Roll dough out.

Melt butter and brush onto the dough. Sprinkle sugar and cinnamon as desired.  Roll into tube shape and cut off 1 inch slices of tube to form buns.

Place buns on baking pan 1½ inches apart.  Cover with tea towel and let rise again.  Approx. ½ hour.

Bake for 20 – 25 minutes in 350 F oven

Drizzle with icing sugar (optional)

For the last few months, our focus has been on weight loss. That’s usually the case with Thanksgiving, Christmas and especially New Years! Once all the figgy pudding is put aside we ask ourselves, how can I take off the weight? It’s tough, but I’ve witnessed many of you putting your plans into action, and I’m excited to share in your journey—so press on!

But this month, as we celebrate the resurrection of our Lord Jesus Christ, I’d like to shift us in a slightly different direction on our journey to Live Well.

In my book The Mom Complex, I encourage women to “wade through the toys in search of the joys.” I urge them to search inside themselves, so that they can discover the path that God has placed their feet on. It’s important that we see that path today—not tomorrow, because God has already begun a work in us that’s waiting to be uncovered, dusted off and embraced.

We can start by putting aside the “ifs” and the “buts” today:

I’d be happier if this house was bigger…
I’d be happier if my stomach was tighter…
I’d be happier if only I could wear a size 7 again…
I have a great marriage, but my husband doesn’t take me out enough…
My kids are wonderful, but my two year old is going through a phase right now…
I used to spend time with the Lord, but lately I’m swamped for time…

There’s a proverb that says, “As a man thinks in his heart, so is he.” ~ Proverbs 23:7. So don’t think for a minute that the discouragement you wear in your heart won’t show on your face. Happiness is one cosmetic that’s God given and free for all. I want it—don’t you? Of course we do. I’d love to wear a smile 24/7 if I could, but even more than happiness itself, I want contentment–true joy with the peaceful knowledge that God is in control. Yes—I’ll still have dreams and hopes which will point me in one direction or the other, but ultimately when I lay my desire on the alter of worship where I trust God for my life, I’ll allow God’s grace to power each step. That’s what contentment does, and it’s learned by patience and practice. The apostle Paul said, “for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content.” ~ Philippians 4:11b, KJV

Let’s look at five ways to find contentment in your life today:

1. Stop Looking Back
   Remember Lot’s wife—otherwise known as the pillar of salt? Wow, I praise God that I’m not in her shoes, because I’ve also looked back a thousand times more than I should have. I’ve also looked to the side, and forward as well—it’s a wonder I don’t suffer neck pain!

   Longing for the things of the past, or the things of the future is our way of saying, I’m not content with that which I have, or I don’t trust God with my future. Sodom was a sinful and corrupt place to be, and yet for lack of faith, Lot’s wife looked back. I’ve done the same as I’ve looked back on my sinful past wishing I could pick and choose certain things that I lost—like that 23-inch waist, or skin so tight it snapped into place.

   But I’ve also been looking to the future with far too much anxiety, praying that God would open doors, clarify my path, give me direction, and make me skinny. The praying is good, but the problem is that I fail to leave the anxiety there, and I carry it with me instead. It’s like taking a trip to the cleaners then hauling your dirty laundry back home again. Doesn’t make much sense when you consider how fruitless it is.

   I’ve come to learn that true contentment is when I can say, “I bring my petitions to you, Lord, lay them at Your feet, and trust that Your direction is best for my life,” with the faith to stand by those words.

   Peter wisely guides us on the path to contentment when he writes, Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. ~ 1 Peter 5:7

2. Count your blessings
   Is it quiet in the room? I hope so, because I want you to consider the blessings that you have in your life before you move on. Discouragement of where we are at this moment in life is a roadblock that too many of us are sitting there staring at, hoping that someone will shove it out of the way, so we can move on with our journey.

   Live outward, instead of living an inward focused life. We accomplish this by letting go of the “I wants” for a focus on the “I haves.” Ever see a good cop show where the hero is stuck in traffic? What does he do? He gets out of the car and runs. He can sit there all day saying “I want this car to budge,” or he can use the legs that he has to get moving.

   Look back—I know, I said not to, but we’re making an exception, just this once! Why look back? Because I want you to witness the fact that God is faithful. He has brought you this far, and He isn’t about to leave you where you are today. ‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the LORD, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’ ~ Jeremiah 29:11, NIV

   Let’s start counting those blessings now… Do you have children? A wonderful husband? A pantry full of food? A best friend? A good income? A talent? Sunshine on your face? Great cheekbones? Kind parents? Whatever it is that you can praise God for, do it right now. Go into a room by yourself if you want to, but release your discouragement by receiving the encouragement we find when we dwell on our blessings. Name them as you give thanks to the Lord. That’s when you’ll get past the roadblock and move on in your faith.

   Taste and see that the LORD is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in him. ~ Psalm 34:8, NIV. Amen, Ladies? Oh yeah–Amen!!

1. Delight in the Lord
   Dictionary.com defines delight this way:
   A high degree of pleasure or enjoyment; joy; rapture.

   Have you ever met a hard-core golfer? I mean someone who really delights in the sport? I have, in fact I’ve met a few of them, including my brother in-law, Wayne. Wayne likes golf so much that he invested in the cute little shoes for discerning men who want to give their “feet a treat” on the course. And of course he also picked up graphite clubs, of which he had the handles regripped. He watches golf on television, owns several golf videos and computer games, plans every family vacation within 5 miles of a golf course, subscribes to the sports channel, practices at the driving range in summer and the golf dome in winter, has friends that also love golf, and last but not least–he pines for “Big Bertha,” I know…figure that one out, ladies!

   Can I define delight any better than that? It would be tough, unless I started in about my friend May and her passion for shoes…

   Now let me ask you, do you delight in the Lord? Do you seek to include Him in all that you do? Or is He just a channel that you turn to now and then?
   
   If you haven’t already, then I pray that you will discover the joy that flows, when you delight in the fellowship of the Lord. It may take a bit of slowing down on your part to see it, but His glory is evident in our world, and it’s there to touch and to hold and delight in. Read a Psalm, watch the rain fall, take a walk and chat with Him, watch the clouds float by, hold a newborn, play with a ladybug, give a gift in His name, feel a breeze on your face, hear the sound of laughter, taste a chocolate melting on your tongue, enjoy the smell of your husband, watch a seed sprout in soil… discover Him in all that you do. And when you’re not discovering Him, seek Him out, because when you do—you’ll find Him. Seek Him and praise Him for all that He is; for God delights in the praise of His people.

   Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.
   ~ Psalm 37:4

2. Embrace the Recipe that You Own
   I’m going to go out on a limb and be stereo typical for a moment by saying that women—at least the ones I’ve met—have a tendency to compare themselves with others. Dare I also say often? You may not be the wealthiest, the thinnest, or the most attractive person you know—neither am I. But it’s also likely that there are less attractive, less successful, and less fortunate women then us too. It’s a fact of life. There will always be a prettier, sexier, thinner, and more successful woman than we are, but that’s ok. Let’s accept this fact and move on. Among the glitter, and glitz of Hollywood, there is one thing that it doesn’t posses, and that, my dear, is you. Embrace that.

   There will never be another woman who owns the look, the personality and experiences that you do. Those ingredients make up the recipe that defines who you are, and it’s your gift from the Lord—own it.  Originality is something to be desired, and you’ve got it girl!
   
   For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. ~ Psalm 139:13-14

3. Choose your Reaction
   One of my favorite quotes comes from a line of the old hymn written by Heratio Spafford in 1873, “Whatever my lot Thou has taught me to say, ‘It is well, it is well with my soul.’”

   It’s easy to be happy when we set our minds to it—to wear a smile in the face of sorrow. But expecting to have a Pollyanna view of life in every situation is unlikely. Ecclesiastes 3:4 reads, “[there’s] a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance.” We’ve all experienced moments like these, but the key to contentment is dependant on how we handle our grief in those times of mourning. After two major tragedies in his life, I doubt that Spafford was chipper when he wrote that song, but I don’t doubt for a minute that he was at peace with his life.

   It’s not the things of this world that wound us; it’s our reaction to them. What’s painful to one is encouragement to another, that’s just how our emotions are wired. I lost a baby on Christmas day. In fact I’ve lost five to miscarriage, but this one was particularly painful since I spent boxing day being poked and prodded in the emergency room instead of living with the hope that next Christmas this baby would rest in our arms. I could have worn my grief for months after that, but instead I found contentment knowing that this child had the privilege of spending Christmas day with Jesus Himself, and that next Christmas rather than resting in my arms she’d be resting in His.

   He gives us, “beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he might be glorified.” Isaiah: 61:3

   I’d like to encourage you to consider your reaction the next time you feel a blow. Forgot your keys? Late for a meeting? Didn’t get the job you wanted? The bills are piling up? Remember that your reaction to each situation—whether weak or strong—is the only thing that can hurt you, so choose it well. We can choose to cower in the face of life’s failures, or we can hand our pain over to God, receive from His grace, and live by those words–it is well, it is well with my soul…

©2008, Darlene Schacht

*We advise that you always consult your doctor before starting any diet or exercise program.

In terms of pure romance, no open-shirted, smooth-chested, flowing-haired, pony-riding hero ever held a candle to my grandfather. Though I read and enjoyed all the best fairy tales as a child and spent my fair share of Saturday afternoons sitting through Disney movies, my romantic notions were birthed, formed and cemented at home, watching the way my grandparents interacted.

Clifford loved Mickey–madly, deeply, jealously. Maybe that’s because he found her later in his life (she was forty, he in his mid-thirties). Or maybe it’s because when he met his red-haired beauty, she was just ending her marriage to an emotionally distant, carousing man, and Clifford liked the way she squared her shoulders and lifted her chin in defiance to the choice she’d just made. Whatever the reason, he fell hard and never walked the same again. The power of Mickey kept him staggering the rest of his days.

He was a drinker when they first met; owned a bar, in fact, down on the beach in Mukilteo, not far from where I live now. She didn’t like his drinking but she tolerated it in the beginning, when they first started dating. She let him take her dancing, let him show her off to his drinking buddies and the patrons in his bar. But three or four drinks into the night, he’d grow belligerent, and after awhile she began to wonder if she could live with that kind of energy.

They’d be sitting at a table in some dance joint and the door would open. As people do, those already sitting would glance up to see the newcomers, and those walking in the door would glance about to see who was already there. My grandmother had striking features, the poise of royalty, and that vivid red hair, so it was no wonder that men would often do a double take. Clifford couldn’t stand it. It wasn’t unusual for him to bristle at that second look and bellow across the room, “Put your eyes back in your head! You’ve stared at her long enough!”

Once, he was so enraged at the number of men looking at Grandma that he took a knife out of his pocket and drove it in the table in front of her when he stood to leave for the bathroom, as a silent sign to anyone looking that if they thought about talking to her while he was gone, they’d better think again.

After years of being made to feel invisible by my biological grandfather, years in which she dried up like sponge, I’m sure Clifford’s furious love was a needed downpour. Even years later, when she’d recount those stories to me, her face would soften and she’d grin shyly. But the drinking was too much. One night, after arguing over his behavior in a bar, she took off her high heel, hit Clifford over the head as hard as she could, and threw his car keys over a rocky embankment down by the beach. Her parting words, as she hobbled back to the bar to call a friend for a ride, were, “I’m not going to spend my life with a drinker.”

Clifford quit drinking on the spot. She waited six months, just to make sure he meant it, and then allowed him to marry her. And they stayed in that sober-but-wild, blissful, romantic state for the remainder of his days–right up until he died, twenty-one years later.

Passionate love is real. I suppose it’s because of my upbringing that I’ve never doubted its existence. Maybe because of that, I don’t have a problem believing that God loves me with that same depth of passion. Reading Song of Solomon was, to me, confirmation of what I think I always knew on some subconscious level–if we mere humans can love someone with that kind of abandon, surely God can do it on a grander scale. When I read in Scripture that He is a jealous God, I thought, Well, sure. When someone belongs to you, you don’t want others staring at them or trying to steal them away when you’re out of the room. Sometimes you have to do something drastic to drive the point home.

In my mind, it wasn’t a far leap from a knife driven into a table to spikes driven into a cross. Sometimes it takes a wild, extreme act to let someone know how much you love them–and to let them know your love will last forever.

For I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from his love. Death can’t, and life can’t. The angels won’t, and all the powers of hell itself cannot keep God’s love away. Our fears for today, our worries about tomorrow, or where we are–high above the sky, or in the deepest ocean–nothing will ever be able to separate us from the love of God demonstrated by our Lord Jesus Christ when he died for us. – Rom 8:38-39 (TLB)

©2008, Shannon Woodward

It was Elaine’s passion for reading the Word that first drew me into friendship with her. We met through CWO’s Facebook group and began chatting on the topic of “What have you read in the Word lately?” I discovered that when you ask Elaine Bateman that question, you always get an enthusiastic response.

As I’ve come to know this woman a little more over recent months, I’ve learned that a zeal for serving Christ is a large part–if not the entire part–of who this woman is. One other thing I’ve learned–her zeal is contagious!

I hope you enjoy getting to know this wonderful woman of faith as I have. She’s Jesus first–all else second–and she’s here to share her testimony of faith with you…

Elaine, it’s such a privilege to have you here with us this month. I’ve read your testimony before, and I’m sure that many of our readers would be interested in hearing it too. So thank you for this opportunity, of once again peering into your life.

Let’s start at the beginning. Can you tell us where you grew up?
I grew up in an American camp/base in Venezuela, South America.

How old were you when you first accepted Christ?
I was nine years old when I accepted the Lord. I truly began a relationship with my Savior later on in life.

What type of Christian upbringing did you have?
It was very conservative. I was raised in a fundamental Baptist home, with a lot of do’s and don’ts, instead of teaching a strong relationship with Jesus. I had more of a religion than a relationship.

You’ve said that at a young age, you felt called to be a missionary. What stopped you?
I felt called to be a missionary to Venezuela when I was attending Bob Jones University. At that time in my life I had just broken off an engagement. My family wasn’t in agreement with my breaking up the engagement, and so they asked different people from my church (including the Pastor) to visit me. They urged me to reconsider, and to follow my commitment of marriage. I was told even at that age what to do, so I obeyed and married at 21.

Let’s talk about your father for a minute, since he was such an important part of your life. His story is both interesting and tragic; can you tell us a bit about that?
My father was an incredible Godly man. He lived a life that honored the Lord, and will be forever in my heart and mind. My Dad sacrificed everything to make sure he was with us growing up. He played with the farm league in the Yankee’s team and later was offered to go with that team. He turned it down, because it took so much time away from us. He was very traditional. I will never forget when he took us out of a church service because the band was playing a set of drums! He was funny and was loved by many.

In 1982, after retiring from the United States government, he was working as a part time manager in a Hotel/gas station in Palmetto, GA. While working there, he was murdered by an angered ex-employee. He was shot four times.

I’m so sorry for your loss, Elaine. How have you dealt with his death?
Darlene, I don’t think you really ever deal with a dear one’s death, but rather it is a day-by-day healing by the faith and truth in my Savior, Jesus Christ. I can’t even fathom how people can handle the death of a loved one without the hope of seeing them again. I will miss my dad always but forever will have the joy and peace of reuniting with him again, soon!

In your testimony I read that you became the mother of four children. You said, “We looked like the perfect family on the outside.” What did you mean?
We looked polished on the outside. We knew the mechanics of what a “good Christian couple” should look like and act. I was stay at home mom, home schooled, and had a home daycare. I was also a deacon’s wife but something was missing in my life, and in my marriage.

You told me, “I committed the sin I said I would never do.” Please tell us about that.
I really don’t want to play the martyr here, so please understand that even if my husband didn’t show me love, or respect, or committed adultery through pornography, it didn’t give me the right to sin against my beautiful and merciful Savior.

Psalm 51:4 reads, ” Against you, you only, have I sinned, and done this evil in your sight.”

When my husband sinned I decided to listen to outside sources, including popular talk shows. I didn’t study God’s Word to depend on it when the hard times came. This is why I am so in love with Him, and His Word, and really mentor women to read and study His Word! When you are not in His Word that is the time that Satan sends something beautiful before your eyes.

I had problems, but at this time I didn’t share them with anyone other than a “young man” that had been a friend of our family for a while. I was a very judgmental person. I knew of a young lady that had been committing adultery, and thought I’ll never do that!

Two years later I had fallen into that sin. My marriage was in shambles. I repented and was broken. I went forward in the church and asked forgiveness. Only 2 people out of 200 came and said they forgave me; others just walked out and carried on with their lives. I was humiliated and alone. My husband used that act of sin and attacked me with everyone I knew and fellowshipped with.

Where did that leave you and your children?
I needed time. I wanted professional counseling, but he said no. He used his power to tell me I had to, and will submit to him. I was frightened and lost.

My children and I found shelter in my mom’s house. I just needed a place to rest. Not searching for a divorce, but rather to get help. Two weeks later my brother had me evicted from my mom’s house, but I found a home elsewhere before the eviction happened.

How did you handle the shame and the guilt?
Romans 8:1 ” There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk according the flesh, but according to the Spirit.” I remember crying because of my sin, and I realized that my Savior is my best friend who has always been by my side. His love is unconditional and His mercy is everlasting. Our marriage failed. It was a time of sadness and pain, with the children between parents. Pride prevailed but our Savior took me by the hand and has never let go since.

When and how did you meet the wonderful man that you’re married to now?
I actually heard his testimony in a “Singles Again” service in 1994. I met him face to face in February of ‘95 in the Baptist church where he mentored young men and young women. I thought I’d never marry again and had no interest, especially after realizing he had custody of his four boys.

At that time I was studying the book of Hosea, and when I heard my husband’s testimony, he reminded of Hosea. That is when I realized that I was falling in love with him.

How is this relationship different than the last?
My relationship and marriage is totally different because my relationship and commitment to my Savior is real! I love Him with all of my heart, spirit and soul. My commitment to Jesus Christ is not the relationship I had with Him before. Because of my relationship with Christ, the relationship to my beautiful husband is an indescribable durable and lasting one. This is incredible because both of us love and are commitment to Christ first, and then to each other. My previous relationship was based on rules, not love for Christ.

What has it been like being the mother of, 8 children and 7 dogs?!
We have an incredible home with his, mine, and ours. We had eight children when we first married, but since we have two more daughters and one son. We have never had a honeymoon; the day after our wedding we started our blended family.

We have acquired about ten more kids since that day in ‘95. We have a home that is opened for young adults who want to change their lives for Christ. For the most part these kids have never had a godly father figure in their lives and have never experienced what a family is. We have two children that are with the Lord. Sometimes our home can be quite chaotic, but then isn’t’ our Christian walk like that sometimes? I have to run this home with a schedule and much love. Everyone works together, even helping with our 6 Jack Russells. We are a team and no one is an island to himself. The boys in our home treat the girls with much respect. It is really an incredible home with Christ in the center!

Elaine, I’d love to be the fly on the wall, it sounds like a wonderfully busy place full of love and service to God. What ministries is your family involved in?
Our whole family is involved in many aspects of ministry. We have a very unique calling. We serve the fellowship of believers. We go where we are needed. Right now our kids lead worship at Calvary Chapel. We are missionaries here in Brunswick. We have home Bible Study every night of the week. We eat together with believers and study, and reason together in Bible study.

My husband and I speak when asked too. I speak to women in conferences, retreats, or brunches. I love sharing my testimony when asked. My husband and I also do marriage counseling and mentor couples. The Lord has allowed us to comfort others, as we were comforted in our time of need. Our ministry really began in our home and is extended into our city! It is amazing to see what our Savior is doing!

While my husband is teaching men, I am teaching women how to be Godly and use the beauty the Lord has given them from the inside out–1 Peter 3. I also use Ruth, and Esther to mentor young women in their walk with the Lord!

I would also like to mention briefly that my husband will be hiking the Appalachian Trail on behalf of fathers. He wants to bring awareness to the importance of the role of fathers. He is also sharing the gospel on the trail as a missionary–a unique calling. We are staying behind in support of this journey. To know more about this please visit www.hike4fathers.com

Bible study every night! That’s awesome! Can you leave us with a scripture that God has recently laid on your heart?
We have been studying the book of Ecclesiastes and this verse has been very dear to my heart. Ecclesiastes 12:13-14 “Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man. For God shall bring every work into judgment, with every secret thing, whether it be good, or whether it be evil.”

This is truly the conclusion of our lives. I’d also like to encourage you to hang on. For all this will pass away, but what we do for our Savior is what will last.

I am so in love with Christ. Let’s enjoy our walk with Him, so our testimony will let others know who we belong to! We have such a peace during the hard times, that others want to know how we do it!