I wear a mask pretending I’ve forgiven a certain person. It’s a great mask, all nice and pretty with a smile attached every time I see her. Yet, when I see her, I’m just not sure I’ve relinquished full forgiveness because I still really don’t want to be around her too much.
This has gone on for a few years and yes I’ve prayed about it and asked for God to help me love her. And I think I do. I don’t wish her any harm, but unfortunately I don’t shout for joy over her victories either. Will you ever read my words again, now that I have been so honest?
I’ve tried, at times, to pull this mask from my face, but it is attached very well. Tugging and jerking hard, it comes off and healing begins; then as time goes by, I remind myself, or the enemy reminds me, that holding a record of wrongs is my prerogative. So I reach in my bag and take it out again and I’m behind my mask of pretending, while all the time I’m still in unforgiveness mode.
So, is there anything I can do? Nope. Not really. As hard as I might, there isn’t one thing I can do to get rid of this ugly thing.
Yet there is Someone who can. Jesus in me wants to rip all these masks off so I can be the REAL ME, the AUTHENTIC ME. I may have to love her the way she is, accept her where she’s at, let Him love her through me because I can’t do it. I might even need to let Jesus change ME.
I may have to apologize. I MAY have to bless her! I MAY have to pray for her! I may have to minister to this woman. We all have those sandpaper people who come into our lives and rub us the wrong way. Yet thanks be to God He doesn’t waste one single minute of the despair they might have caused us.
Romans 8:28 And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose. He will bring something good out of the bad things for all those called according to His purpose. That’s you and me, fellow beloved believer.
Masks just aren’t worth the trouble. They hold us captive to being someone we really aren’t. So I say, “Will the real me stand up?”
Colossians 3:12-13 So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you.
Let Him clothe us in His forgiveness!